Monday, August 09, 2004

so, in pretty much a collective effort to make me crap my pants...

Nashville's much maligned music scene is bringing me, in the matter of months, Wilco, TV on The Radio, and REM. Plus other stuff I don't even know about! This stuff doesn't happen in SA!

Anyways, sorry I haven't written anything in a while...I guess I've been busy...and by that I mean watching baseball every night if there isn't a good movie on.

So today I went fishing again, with the knowledge that I need turkey livers to catch fish. So I go to Frank's and buy some, and damn it, if those fish didn't bite every 5 seconds...too bad I didn't figure out how to sink the I'm still 0 for eleventybillion in the catch department. But I fed those catfish pretty well, I think I'm gonna start a catfish feeding business, with me as the sole proprieter.

ok, this is the greatest story to happen to me since I came to Columbia. If you're not sitting down right now, do so immediatly.

I'm down there at my spot, just minding my own business. Today was a big day for fishing, we had me, unemployed Mexican man, and random pregnant woman trying our luck on the Duck. Around 9:30, pregnant woman walks over to me. Seems she broke her line and can't get the other line out of the spool. So being a nice guy, I fix it for her. That in itself is pretty ordinary. It's what was said while I was fixing her pole that is worthy of recording for history's sake. Now I promise that everything I write here was actually said to me, as fantastical as it might seem.

Prego: Yup, I'm getting tired of feeding for two here.
Me: How many months left?
Prego: 8 or so. My friend asks if I should get a DNA test, but I know it's his and besides it would be too dangerous now.
Me: (Nervous Laughter) haha, yeah.
Prego: Yup, and when I eat too much the little feller starts kickin' me, like "momma, stop that!" You got any kids of your own?
Me: (More Nervous Laughter) Um, no.
Prego: I need to get a place of my own, I'm only living with him cause I don't have a house of my own. It's so hard to find a good man, you have a kid and they start talking about how they don't want the responsibility and all that shit.
Me: haha, yeah. (wtf?)
Prego: Yup, sure hard to find a good man, you know what I mean?
Me: Yeah. (WTF??? Me, being a man, as it is. So I try to change the subject) You caught anything yet?
Prego: Nope, just you.
Me: (WTMFBAJEZUS? Right now I have no idea what to I hurridly finish up her pole and hand it back, coated with more of my nervous laughter, and she walks away.)

I was hit on by a 30 year old, 8 months pregnant, welfare mother. Is that a good thing? Should I count that as the first bite on my singlehood, or is it second to the giggling freshman girls who kept talking to me when I visited that church last sunday? I really don't know what to think here.

Ok, that's enough for right now. Later.

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