Wednesday, September 29, 2004


College Students Rejoice!

Monday, September 27, 2004

Ode to the guy who still thinks it's 1987...

Oh guy who sits in the smoke pit and has long hair and wears Slayer t-shirts, you amaze me. You willfully scorn the fact that this is 2004 and laugh in the face of convention by still wearing acid-wash jeans and speed-metal shirts. You refuse to cut your hair and wear it proudly split down the middle, falling ever so rock n' roll on your shoulders. While some might realize that speed-metal has fallen out of favor, you spit in their general direction and dial up more Megadeth.

Guy who still thinks it's 1987, you have moxy.

I salute you.

Friday, September 24, 2004

I knew this was going to happen....

Seriously, I'm convinced the Kerry campaign really wants me to hate him. There's some guy working at his headquarters that's all like, "Hey, remember how everyone said that we were picking John Edwards to appeal to women voters because he's somewhat attractive, and we were all like 'No way, homes, we chose Edwards for his vast political experience?' Well you know what, we lied!"

And I'm all at home, being like, "Man, I wish that John Kerry would give me a reason to like him. Bush, while incompetent, still is a much better leader than this man. But maybe there's something to him that they haven't revealed yet, something magical."


Man, Kerry campaign, this is low. I mean, I knew it was only a matter of time before you told the "political experience" card to go screw itself and reveal your true intentions, but somewhere in me I wanted you to prove me wrong. But you didn't. And I was right. Yet again.

Democrats, can't you see your error? Is it too late to jump off the ship? You might think that a Bushless US is better, but do you realize you're giving us a Kerry US, which is worse? Give me Howard Dean least he showed some moxy. And he wasn't all like "Hey man, I'm a moderate" and then go and vote like fucking Ted Kennedy on pot. Dean was honest. He was like "Hey man, I like the gays...I let them marry. So what." Again, the man had balls.

Bush has balls too. Though often times his ball-reaction is wrong, at least he has them. I bet Kerry's got shot off in 'Nam. Oh wait, did he get a medal for that? Someone look into that.

John Kerry...the eunuch.

Impressionistic Art vs. Renaissance Art

So, I've had the opportunity to see examples of the best of what these genres have to offer, and pretty much, Reniassance kicks Impressionistic art's ass. It's like somone shat on a DaVinci and called it a Monet. I will discuss this in more detail later.

Tuesday, September 21, 2004

You're That Guy!!

"Yeah, I know that guy. Wait a minute, I was the only kid with a real band in high school, and some people thought I was kind of a rock star, dammit...I hate you guys. I am that kid." - Kyle.

Ok, we all knew this was true in our subconsious, but it came to the startling forefront during dinner tonight. 99% of the male population at Belmont is "that guy." So, what does "that guy" mean? Ok, remember that guy in high school who was just a little left of center? The guy who wore the Modest Mouse t-shirt and had the random emo band patch on their bookbag? The guy who played guitar and was in choir? The guy who dyed his hair and styled it into a faux-hawk? The kid who wore jeans that were just too tight? The guy who watched independant films and swore that documentaries were cool? The kid who was voted in their high school yearbook as "most likely to sit on a street corner in Memphis and play his guitar?"( Um, yeah...fuck you SMH) That one kid from every high school across America? He now goes to Belmont.

We are a collection of band nerds, drama geeks, emo kids, and glam rockers. And we are not ashamed anymore.

The kids who wanted to dress like punk rockers but couldn't cause they would have gotten their asses beat in HS? They're dressed to the nines here. The kid who fronted that shitty band that played that shitty club in your hometown once? Yeah, he's forming a band here...and they still suck.

Because the female population here is so high compared to the guys, the girls who fall into the "that guy" category seem slim, but they're there too. They're just outweighed by the All-region choir girls, and the girls that sang in the church choir who are here as "Classical Voice Majors" or "Commercial Voice Majors" which is just street for "Please Marry Me Cause I Will Never Have A Real Career Major." Or Ebonics for "Housewife."'re that guy.

Great Exchange of the Night:
Eric- man, I think the gay black guy on the real world must be faking it...I bet they're paying him a lot to be a faux-homo
Sara-: haha no way
Eric- way...the dude is too ghetto to like the man
Eric-I can't believe I just admitted I watch the real world

Tuesday, September 14, 2004

Finally! A CD review!

The Black Keys - Rubber Factory

When I was a kid, I fell in love with the blues. Blame it on Stevie Ray Vaughan and his Live at the El Mocambo, but I used him as a springboard into every ancient bluesman ever. I bought the complete Robert Johnson set, worshiped Lightnin' Hopkins, learned a bunch of Albert King riffs, and ventured to Austin to catch B.B. King and Buddy Guy because I was convinced they'd die by now.

Then I fell in love with punk, like all suburban white kids. No need to go into that. But as a budding songwriter, I wanted to combine my two loves, blues and punk. But I didn't know anyone else who was down with that in San Antonio, TX. So I gave up my dream of a punk/blues band and got into indie music and became a much more competent musician. I forgot about my former dream.

Then I heard the Black Keys. These guys are the band I had always wanted to be. And maybe that will cloud my judgement of this disc, but if flat out rocks. A good dose of blues mixed in with a punk attitude and delivery.

The first single, 10 Am Automatic, is amazing. It's one of those 50 plays a day songs on my iTunes player. Brilliant. Grand. I love this cd...go buy it now.

Bryan, you want to know why John Kerry is a douche?
refrence -

Because his wife is one too...amazingly. There's just something I can't stand about this woman. Is it because she's a rich heiress whose entire family is probably voting republican but she married a liberal douche so she has to espouse values and policies that will harm her business? no, it's more because of this statement:

Fashionwise, Heinz Kerry said she likes Oscar de la Renta, often wears Ralph Lauren and sometimes buys clothes off the rack.

HOLY SHIT!! SHE BUYS CLOTHES OFF THE RACK? Does she realize that fucking 95% of America BUYS CLOTHES OFF THE RACK? Is she trying to make herself look like the hoi poloi by admitting to such horrors? Off the rack? God forbid we don't have dresses and shoes made by the designers themselves? Off the rack? What will the Kennedy's think? She's obviously loosing it. Off the rack??? Only the middle class does that! Oh, I get it. She's trying to get us to think she's one of us! Genius. Now, Teresa, pelase explain the millions of dollars and luxury cars and tell us that you're just like us too. I'm waiting. Did you get those off the rack too?

Maybe it's just me...

But has anyone else looked a notes they've taken for a class and been like "What the hell did I just write?" Because that happened to me a few times today in Byrne's class.

So I went to da club...

With James, Michael, Bryan, Giacomo, Michael's sister Jenny, and this girl named Elaine. Quite possibly one of the weirdest experiences of my life. I dunno who thought this concept up, but they were obviously high. There was also a very high number of drunk old men that just scared the crap out of me, and just walked through the dancefloor hoping to grab a feel of some drunk girl. It just seemed creepy to me. But the highlight of the night was this fat asian guy who asked if he could dance with us then told me he was on Ecstacy. Amazing. Michael and I agreed that we're doing this every weekend...because we're cartoon superheroes.


Friday, September 10, 2004


Despite my good intentions, the combination of Alberti's "On Painting", Heineken, and the Colts-Pats game was not a productive study session.

Is there nothing worse than clinging on to the past, even when the past sucked? Case in point, Emerson Hart, who refers to himself as "Emerson Hart, from Tonic" First off, Tonic sucked ass, and that was back in the mid 90's when they'd let anything on the radio (Live? PLEAAASE). Secondly, get past it idiot. Your band sucked, yet you're still trying to ride its coat tails. Tonic...sucked. Emerson Hart, from even more, you pathetic loser. Come on brother, play those hits of, you couldn't even hold a candle to Hootie and the Blowfish.

Monday, September 06, 2004

Things I'm Addicted To...

1.) Solitaire
2.) Reading people's lists on and being like, "You idiot, there's no way Hail to the Thief was better than Chutes Too Narrow"
3.) Checking people's away messages
4.) Coffee
5.) Those gormet suckers Mrs. Duquette sent that no one else seems to like
7.) Trying to become a regular at some establishment so the person behind the counter will be all like "Hey man, the usual?"
8.) Making fun of Bryan (that will spawn another column)
9.) Buying records
10.) Water

Thursday, September 02, 2004

So I was talking with Geoff and Brett today at lunch...

And seriously, has there been a better politician than Arnold? The man is a total laugh riot everytime he speaks, and California seems to be doing pretty well since he took over. I mean, anyone with the balls to say "Economic Girlie Men" is obviously a better pol than any of the presidential candidates out there. Would anyone be against amending the constitution to let him run for President? I would be for it. Put him with Jesse Ventura, and that is a ticket that you cannot beat. Except maybe the one with Screech and Sinbad.