Monday, May 23, 2005

Coffee and Sunflower Seeds...
are my lifeblood

List of Random Stuff
  1. Number of times "Revolution Blues" by Neil Young was playing when I entered a McDonald's parking lot: 2
  2. Number of times Tara's mother attempted (unsuccesfully) to tell me why Tara chose Belmont: 2
  3. Number of blind horses that ran into me: 1
  4. Number of huge metal crosses I encountered: 2
  5. Worst Driver Award: The woman in the Econoline van who tailed me for 5 miles outside of Paducah, KY when I was going 80mph and no one was around for miles.
  6. Time I was most likely to die (Tied with Gayest Moment) : Singing along to a Gwen Stefani song in Effingham, Il, pulling into a gas station next to a guy with a Confederate flag in his window (I could have sworn Illinois was part of the Union...)
  7. Word said the most on my ride back: "idiot"
  8. Bocce ball means "little balls" ball


Dear United States Government,
Before I take a trip to Decatur, Illinois again, I would like you to fix a few things:
  1. Please find a better name for "Land Between The Lakes State Park"
  2. I-24 turns to crap as soon as I hit the KY state line. Please spend some money and make road driveable.
  3. Please get rid of that huge metal cross in Effingham, Ill that scared me to death when it rose like a monster over the horizon.
  4. Please make a nationwide declaration that the speed limit is 70, not 65 like KY and Il seem to think it is.
  5. Please make an law declaring that when you have to slow down, it is not a "speed zone." There is nothing speedy about slowing down from 65 to 45mph.
  6. And finally, please make the terrain of Illinois more interesting. Adding hills would be nice. And trees. That'd be cool too.

Thanks,
Eric Domkowski

All in all, a great trip. Tired me out like no other, but I wouldn't trade it for anything.

-ed

4 comments:

Broo said...

I gotta say... I was having a bad day, until I read your blog... you have quite some humor there!... Thanks - Broo

[kibbe] said...

Ok, so was that city really called Effingham? Or was it Fuckingham and you're trying to make your blog PG?? ;-)

Shandus said...

Ahhh, Land Between the Lakes. One thing I do miss about West Tennessee.

My mom was just telling me last night about a trip she took to Effingham once. Random.

Tara said...

Kibbe's comment pretty much made me laugh really hard! That's definitely what i'm calling that town from now on! Now what to do with Tulusca...Toloma...Toledo...
Tulsa...I mean Tuscola? BTW, maybe you should pay tribute to that poor little chipmunk somehow?