Wednesday, February 08, 2006

Ballz uses the word "analogous"...
Kyle wrote this to the Belmont paper after the Sexy Decoys were written about in it. Glorious.

Dear Vision Editor,

In your recent article concerning intermural sports, I was deeplyconcerned to see one glorious dynasty viewed in a bad light. As theonly graduating member of the Sexy Decoys(tm)Inc I must tell you thatI was extremely displeased with the way you portrayed all of our hardwork and total domination of Belmont Intermural sports. With the spotlight turned to the newly formed "sticky bandits", the point spread differential was one obvious detail left out of the article.
Currently, the Sexy Decoys have 3+ times the points of their nearestcompetition, the Sticky Bandits. Even with the obvious conflict of interest that is the intermural referee system, the Sexy Decoys have all but secured their 2nd straight Bruin Cup. Back to the article, we did not appreciate being compared to "the big guy" in prison who sodomizes small "new guys in prison". Even though our current domination of the intermural world seems analogous to a stitches-inducing prison rape, we do not want it compared in any way to such an act. Please consider this our forma lstatement.

Respectfully,
Decoys Graduating Senior,
Ballz(Kyle Duquette)

-ed

1 comment:

tina said...

ah-mazing. the end.