Gap Jeans CD feat. "Hollywood" - Madonna and Missy Elliot.
0.5 Tacos. Heck, it's not even worth the tin foil the taco comes on, that's why they give it away for free.
"Everybody comes to Hollywood/They want to make it in the neighborhood." One thing that you can say about Madonna is that she a superb businesswoman. More than a decade after she should have been rendered irrelevant, she is still around promoting her 40+ year old, married with kids image as if she was the newest thing. You certainly have to respect her for that, since there is no one to compare her to from her heyday in the 80's. Cindi Lauper? Pat Benetar? Objects of VH1 Behind the Music while Madonna's videos play in steady rotation on MTV. What contributes to her staying power? Sure, you could say the music, but there are plenty of people putting out more worthy recordings than she is. One word - Marketing. Case in point, the new Gap ad with Missy Elliot. Madonna realized that there is no "art" in mainstream pop music, since all focus is on selling records. She has cleverly placed her music in this ad campaign and then used Missy Elliot to attract the "hip-hop" crowd. Despite her techno posings, Madonna is not a techno artist, nor a hip-hop artist. I use the word "artist" very loosely. This product placement will ensure her loads of sales, and one cannot help but admire her for her marketing prowess and insight.
Now I will focus on the music on this cd that my friend Alexa got when she bought Jeans from the Gap. The first track contians what they call "elements" from "Hollywood" and "Into the Groove." What the heck is an element?? Can I touch it? Is it scientific? My God, I hate stupid catch-phrasing like that. Anyways, the best part of this song is that it's only 1:14' long. Madonna asks "How can it hurt you when it looks so good?" I'll tell you, cause it's a hacked-off, absolutly no inspiration track that is so commercial it hurts. And Missy Elliot continues her reign as the "why is she popular?" queen, adding nothing to this song at all, except a stupid mini-rap about how everyone wants to know where she gets those jeans. Ok, I know this is a commercial, and you're supposed to sell things, but is it wrong to to want some integrity from today's musicians? Back to Elliot; she is absoultly the worst "singer" in pop music. Can we even call her a singer? I would rather listen to Macy Gray through a broken guitar amp. Don't even get me started on how "Get Ur Freak On" was quite possibly the worst song of the decade. But she's popular for God knows why, and Madonna brilliantly includes her on this. Don't get any impressions that this is a shared bill, Madonna is clearly the featured performer.
The second and last track on here is what they call the "Jaques tu Cont's thin white duck mix" of Hollywood, a track that is on Madonna's newest album and also had "elements" (OH BOY!) of it taken for the first track, which is basically just the vocals. I think I read about this guy in a Remix mag a while back, some French guy, whoopdedoo. This is a straight up electronica/techno track. Maybe it's good dancefloor stuff, it's danceable. I guess that's all they are looking for. But for originality, it sucks. I've been listening to techno for a few years now, and while I'm no expert, I tire easily of the cookie-cutter "kick-hat-snare-hat" drum pattern that infects most techno. I am more drawn to exotic drum patterns that keep me guessing. This song is ultimately predictable and boring, and lasts way too long for it's own good (7:09')
Sometimes I will never understand pop music. Like how they let someone is utterly no talent like Elliot become a huge star, and how they act like hyprocrites by allowing something that's not new (Madonna) have a say in the current music scene. Maybe it should be refreshing that they haven't kicked her to the curb like they do with most acts that had a wane in popularity, but the quality of the music that is produced still leaves me wondering at their intellegence.